(This probably works better if you read it in a Geordie accent)

It’s Day 1 in the Big Blogger house, and Masher is seated in front of his computer.

His chin rests in his hands as he stares at his computer screen, waiting for inspiration.

He hasn’t moved for two hours now and it looks like… no, no, wait, he’s started to slowly type something.

It’s a letter T, followed by an H and then an E. He’s typed the word THE.

And he’s quickly followed that up with LAST.

Oh, this is marvellous. It took him a long time to get going, but now he’s gone straight in with the definite article – a risky proposition some might say, but then he’s thrown caution to the wind and  dropped an adjective in there rather than following it up with a noun. Fantastic stuff.

T. I. M. E.

TIME. He’s written “THE LAST TIME”. And now… no, hold on, he’s stopped again… ahh, no man, he’s backspaced through it all and is once again staring at a blank screen. Bloody shame, he was going so well. His head is in his hands again.

Well, it looks like it’s going to be a long day – and maybe a long month – and so, whilst we wait, we’d like to take you over to this fantastic piece of prose written by Dave.