Friday was my daughter’s sixth birthday. SIX! It seems like only yesterday I was scrubbed up waiting for her to be born (Yes, that is me, looking like an awkward extra from Casualty).
Over the weekend, Mrs M threw her a big High School Musical themed party: thirty kids in a church hall… it was [...]
I was minding my own business, eating my tea and toast this morning in Tesco’s so-called ‘Restaurant’, when I heard “Hello Mark, how you doin’?”
I looked up to see a young fella - younger than me, anyway - standing there, holding a tray of food. “Mind if I join you?” he asked, sitting down at [...]
A golf cart has a top speed of… what… 12 to 15 MPH?
As far as I’m aware golf carts have no licence to be used on public roads.
And yet, apparently, it is OK to drive one on the A40, in the morning, during the peak traffic period, as long as your mate drives behind you [...]
Anyone listening to BBC Radio London yesterday afternoon, would have heard my not-so-dulcet tones on the Danny Baker show.
Normally, I’ll email in the occasional contribution to the show, but yesterday, having heard him pose a question as I drove home, I decided to be brave and actually phone in.
One of the eighteen 19-year olds answered [...]
Possibly not.
But either way, I feel sorry for Rudolph Mayer - Josef Fritzl’s defense lawyer.
What a shit job he’s been given.
When I was younger, I went ice skating on a semi-regular basis. I wasn’t much cop at it, but I could get up some speed and had a confidence on the ice.
I’ve tried to persuade the current Mrs Masher, several times over the years, that we should go. “It’ll be fun!” But she has always [...]
Right, let’s clear this up once and for all, people. Because, frankly, it’s starting to annoy me.
Let me tell you now: there is NO SUCH THING as a Digital TV Aerial.
A chap at work asked if I could fit a digital TV aerial for him, before he splashed out on an expensive new telly. Being [...]
I had lunch today in an American Diner. In Greenford.
Shipped in from the US some years ago, it gave a pretty authentic feel as to what one of these diners would have been like in the fifties.
The decor inside was all pretty art deco looking and The Everly Brothers played quietly in the background.
Sitting at [...]
There is nothing stickier and more difficult to remove from your fingers, mobile phone, spectacles and anything else you may have chosen to put in your coat pocket, than a melted Fox’s Glacier Mint.
Just thought you should know.
I have a cousin. Actually I have lots of cousins. The one I am referring to here, we shall call John. Because that’s his name.
John is several years older than me and is a bit of a clever bugger: an electronic design engineer, by profession.
I remember always being slightly in awe of him when I [...]
Well, that post title should get my Google rankings up in no time!
As I sat at the Magic Roundabout this morning, waiting to pull out, there was a bang and I suddenly lurched forward.
Another car had hit me astern.
I pulled over to the side and the old blue Nissan that had hit me, pulled in [...]
Well, another monthly blogathon over.
That wasn’t too bad, was it? Was it? Oh, it was? OK, I’ll try harder next year.
In truth, this year’s attempt didn’t seem as difficult as in previous years. Okay, some of my posts may not be going down in blogging history for literary excellence - oh, alright, none of the [...]